October 26, 2010

With self development there is so much to discover. I have found in my journey, one of the most important aspects to challenge, is our inner chatter that holds us back from what we want.

When we are faced with stressful situations, we tend to have negative thoughts come up. This ‘little voice’  inside can hold us back sometimes.

Have you ever been in a situation where you thought, “I can’t do this. I don’t know how. This is too hard.   I’m not good enough. What makes you think you can do that? What are you thinking? I have never been able to do this, so what makes me think I can do it now? I don’t want to make any mistakes.  I’m too tired. Why would anyone want to listen to me? I don’t understand”.

I would like to share three unique techniques I use when my little voice gets in my way. The great thing is that these don’t require any medications, psychologists, psychiatrists or therapists.  I learned these from Blair Singer and they work for me. Try them! See if they will work for you.

The Stop Technique

The first one is my favourite as it is so simple and easy to remember in every situation. For instance when I was asked to write an article in 25 minutes, my little voice said, ‘No way! I know it takes a lot longer than that in my experience.   So I said ‘Stop! Thank you for sharing but I am going for it.’

So your first technique is simply to say ‘Stop’.

Deal with Adversity Technique

Let’s face it. Things don’t always go as we want them to. When this happens, our self talk can get pretty loud.  First of all, don’t take the things personally and let it go. Next make sure you keep whatever just happened in perspective.  Don’t make it global; meaning, don’t say things like,  ‘This always happens to me’ or ‘Why does this always have to happen to me?’   Remind yourself that each incident is separate and isolated.

This one takes practice but with repetition, it can be a life saver and quiet that chatter.

Celebrating Wins

When something good happens in your life, take one of your hands and make a fist and physically pull your hand back towards you body as you say ‘Yes’.  Then say, ‘I deserve this success and this great energy will continue throughout the week to come’. You can also use this action to look at all the good things in your life and give your attention to them as you do this action.

This technique will orientate you to notice when you are successful and congratulate yourself more.

I trust that you will find these helpful and that in your next stressful situation, you remember that there are some techniques that can bring you back into the present moment and into a state of resourcefulness. Life is meant to be lived in a state of joy and these techniques can help us get back to a joyful state. Even if it is not outright joy, then heading in that direction.

Watch for my next blog where you will learn three more techniques that will help you quiet your little voice and help you get more out of life.

As always, I love getting your feedback. Here on my blog, you’ll get commentluv. That’s a plug-in that allows you to leave a link back to your own site when you leave a comment.

Until next time,


About the author 


I’m a Canadian, gluten-free, tai chi loving, great-grandmother. I live in Ontario and love helping people get healthy again.   I use all the experience I have gained in the almost 5 decades to help you live a life full of vitality with great clarity and focus.

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